God's Reminder

thank God for sustaining me throughout the past few weeks and reminding me each day that His grace is sufficient for me! :)

as workload gets heavier with more projects, assignments and tests coming up, i started to feel stress and afraid that i cant cope. i started to think of getting away from all things and juz wanted to spend all my time to finish my work. but the more i wan to get away from things, the more things i got! anyway, this kind of things happen most of the time. the more u dun want, the more u get it!

so when i was on my way to school one day, god reminded me through the song 祷告 that He will provide me the strength i need each day and His grace is sufficient for me! from that day till now, i'm still being reminded of the same thing EVERY DAY, especially when i thought of the tons of things i have to do and not having enough time to complete! :)

God touched my heart during worship today. juz at the starting first few lines of the new song (阿爸天父 by 赞美之泉), tears filled by eyes. when it came to this line of the chorus (打开心门，领受你大爱) i started crying! and i just cant stop crying until the next song! i feel God's presence and know that He is working in me! :)

if you had read my post previously, you will know that i googled "jesus i'm afraid" before. God spoke to me clearly today. He reminded me once again tt He will not leave me nor forsake me! and NOT TO BE AFRAID! yes! He knows what i'm thinking about, and what i really need! :)

though my travelling time to school and back home is long, but honestly i enjoyed it! becoz i enjoyed my conversations with God! :) the more i talk to Him, the more secured i feel. i know i'm growing up in Him, and my faith is growing! and there is nothing i need to be afraid of! All things are possible in Him! :)

祷告 - 讚美之泉

祷告 因为我渺小
祷告 因为我知道我需要
明瞭 你心意对我重要

祷告 已假装不了
祷告 因为你的爱我需要
你关怀 我走过的你都明白

有些事我只想要对你说
因你比任何人都爱我
痛苦从眼中流下
我知道你为我擦

在早晨我也要来对你说
主耶稣今天我为你活
所需要的力量你天天赐给我
你恩典够我用

Jesus Goes With Me (I'm Not Afraid) - Lamar Campbell

I'm not afraid anymore, Jesus goes with me
I'm not ashamed anymore, His blood has set me free
I never worry when Jesus goes with me everything's ok

When I'm burdened He's there
When I'm lonely He's there
Through disappointments He's there
Even in sadness He's there
I never worry when Jesus goes with me everything's ok

So glad, that, Jesus goes with me
I'm glad about it, yes, Jesus goes with
Glad, I'm glad, Jesus goes with me

i googled "jesus i'm afraid" and i saw the lyrics of this song. wanted to find the song, but i cant find it. anyway, i was ministered when i read the lyrics. it was a reminder to me that He's always there no matter where i am, what i do, how i feel and everything will be alright! :)

recently, god is constantly reminding me that i will never walk alone, for He is ALWAYS with me! well, it's time for me to register it in my heart that He's there for me AT ALL TIMES! and also finding my security in HIM!

From Two Different Aspects

juz as i finish checking my mails, i saw this news title or whatever it's called on yahoo homepage.

"The worst is yet to come"

at that moment, i stunt for a while. it looks so familiar yet, it's NOT! i remembered wat we always proclaim during prayer meet, "The best is yet to come"! and now i saw the direct opposite of it.

i started thinking about this two phrases. and it reminded me that no matter wat situation i'm facing, it's still not that bad because there might be worst things coming up! on the other hand, if i feel that i'm really in a very jialat situation, i can look forward to the better things that's ahead waiting for me! :)

so no matter wat situation it is, looking at it from these 2 aspects, there's no reason that we can't give thanks in everything! so just learn to give thanks that we are not facing things that could have been worse, and knowing that God's blessings is just ahead waiting for us! :)

As the New Phase Begins...

thank god for everything! i got ALL the modules i bidded for... i got ALL the tutorial slots i wanted... there are friends who attend lectures with me, friends who are in the same tutorial class as me too! :)

actually i felt quite tired, which i also dunno what's the main reason behind it. probably is mentally very tired. probably is i'm still trying to adjust back to study life, with tons and tons of readings, assignments, tutorials, exams, etc... in fact, i think i'm kind of afraid that i cant cope, and subconsciously i think i felt stress.

recently i just felt that there's something not very right in my life, which others might not have noticed. probably there is nothing very wrong, but somehow juz felt that something is not very right somewhere. well, shall not say more about it.

anyway, no matter what it is, i juz got to trust that God won't give me things i can't bear, and He will always be with me to guide and lead me through anything and everything! Lord, thank you!

Journey

It’s a long long journey
Till I know where I’m supposed to be
It’s a long long journey
And I don’t know if I can believe

When shadows fall and block my eyes
I am lost and know that I must hide
It’s a long long journey
Till I find my way home to you

Many days I’ve spent
Drifting on through empty shores
Wondering what’s my purpose
Wondering how to make me strong

I know I will falter I know I will cry
I know you’ll be standing by my side
It’s a long long journey
And I need to be close to you

Sometimes it feels no one understands
I don’t even know why I do the things I do
When pride builds me up till I can’t see my soul
Will you break down these walls and pull me through?

Cause It’s a long long journey
Till I feel that I am worth the price
You paid for me on calvary
Beneath those stormy skies

When Satan mocks and friends turn to foes
It feel like everything is out to make me lose control
Cause It’s a long long journey
Till I find my way home to you... to you

Amazing Love

God's love is so so amazing!! and He is so real to me!

For the past 1 - 2 weeks, i juz felt that God is juz right beside me, listening to me, and telling me wat i should do. haha, he is so real that i was quite shocked and did not know exactly how i should respond to him. at times, he prompted me to do something, but i juz tried to delay or not do it due to the lack of courage, afraid of awkwardness, and thinking too much as to how others will think. but sometimes the prompting is juz so strong that it's a must for me to do it, but i really dunno how to, so i juz can pray to god to open the doors and lead me thru. and in the end, things juz turn out to be so perfect, that i was wondering why should i drag so long to do something! haha.

guess god is training me to be more sensitive to him. learning how to listen and obey him, differentiating wat is from him, and building up my courage to juz do the right thing. :) and it's when u complete all the things god wants u to do, then u will be able to see the most perfect picture, and feel the real peace and joy from the bottom of ur heart!

anyway, i think there is still something i have to do, but have not done it yet. i still owe someone (u know who u are) a prayer. please wait for a little while more ok? i will do it soon! trust me! hahaha, the prompting is still there, and god is waiting for me to do it! haha, well.. i will pray for more courage and the opportunity to do it! :)

He Listens and Answers

i really thank god for today. there's something which god prompted me to do for quite a long time, but i do not have the courage to do it.. until today! well, and things aren't as bad as wat i thought it might be.. and this is a reminder to me. dun always let my thoughts stop me from doing something god wants me to do.

well, i'm really very happy today. throughout the day, i thought of wat had happen today and the past few days, and i really give thanks to him for all that he had done for me. it just shows me how much he loves me and he listens to wat i told him. i might be complaining, grumbling or even doubting him, but he still shows me that he's there for me. :)

juz as i thought of doing things my own ways, he stops me by interrupting what i had firmly decided to do. and it juz seem like he is playing a joke on me. but well deep down in my heart, i know he is not playing a joke on me, but rather he is telling me that this is not the right way to do things. in a week, it happened quite a few times.. opps.. haha.. i'm juz being too rebellious.. :p

anyway, really thank god for today. he answered many of my prayers! :)

他在乎 - 约书亚敬拜

祂在乎你的一切
世界忘记你，神却深爱着你
你无论犯了什么罪
都不能与祂爱隔绝
祂永远爱你，祂真的爱你

祂知道你所有孤单痛苦
祂也看见你每一个经历
你无论犯了什么罪
都不能与祂爱隔绝
祂为你行奇妙大事，就是现在

祂温柔的爱，医治破碎心灵
卸下你忧虑，释放你得自由
祂满有能力，使你生命更新
祂在乎你所有一切

耶稣祂在乎，我知道祂在乎你
耶稣祂真的在乎
耶稣祂真的在乎你和我

Child, I'm Always With You

thoughts.. postive thoughts? negative thoughts? many thoughts.. really many thoughts in mind recently.. it's very tiring! really very tired! :(

"I'm always with you!" - this is what God has been telling me very clearly recently..

though i tried to run away from Him, hide from Him, be rebellious and not listen to what He tells me.. He is still always there for me, listening to me, holding on to me, and loves me just as much.. even if it's things that i prayed and treated as a passing remark after praying, he still listened and answered them.

i doubted Him.. i don't really believe that He has heard all that i've told him. but yesterday during prayer meet, He told me clearly thru Rev Fucai that He heard my prayers! yes, He heard my prayers!!! :) anyway, there's alot more things i've received, and definitely have made quite a great impact to me. but well, i still need time to accept and digest them.. so, i'll have to continue praying and seek Him. :)

running away and hiding is definitely not the best way to solve any problems. it will make one feel more tired and helpless. the more i wanted to run away from serving, the more servings i got... and no matter how i wanted to siam, go one big round, it still comes back to me. haha, what to do? nothing but just obey Him and submit completely to Him!

"Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go" - Joshua 1:9

你是如此爱我

你是如此爱我 爱到为我将你身体打破
你是如此爱我 默默地承担我所有的错
你是如此爱我 天涯到地极我无处可躲
你是如此爱我 爱到体恤我一切的软弱

我爱你因为你先爱我
你的爱像慈绳爱索
啊 我别无所求
因为拥有你的爱
这一生我已足够

it reminded me how much God loves me. there is no reason that i should hide from him, or run away from him. His love for us is indescribable!

22nd Birthday

i prayed to god to let this day of mine be a special day to me.. i got no idea how my day would be, but juz got a feeling that god will have a special gift for me! :p

thank god for giving me a wonderful gift today! :) the gift god gave me is his love for me.. :) god reminded me how much he loves me, and showed me how much he loves me.. :)

actually i dun have any plans and i tot it might be that god wants me to have a good rest at home, and not always running out.. haha.. and i told god that if this is the case, then so be it ba.. though i hope that it won't be such a boring birthday..

god listens to my prayers.. he did not gave me a boring birthday.. god started off my day with receiving smses from many people such as my sec sch frenz, church frenz, colleagues, etc..

in the afternoon, went to meet angie, esther, and sarah at ps.. after that, we met chuan and deren for dinner at blk 3.. and i dunno why and how come, they started singing birthday song at the coffeeshop.. haha.. and after prayer meet, birthday song was sang once again, but this time round with many more people around! haha, i was kind of shocked and abit lost, dunno how to react.. but i really felt very blessed at that moment.. thanks alot guys! i'm really very happy and glad to know that i have many of you brothers and sisters by my side! :)

when i reached home, i got a surprise.. my dad actually bought a cake for me.. he even cook vermicelli (mian xian) with an egg for me! this is the first time i eat vermicelli with egg during my birthday after so many years of birthday! actually i was really quite touched and lost of words when i opened the door, and saw the house was in total darkness with a lighted candle on the cake on the dining table.. :)

i really thank god for today! :) thanks to all for your birthday wishes and blessings, and celebrating my birthday for me! i really thank god for all of you and it's all of you who made this day really special! i really felt blessed knowing that there are so many of you by my side who cares and loves me.. :)

God Never Fails

i'm feeling really tired these few days.. but was quite happy.. :)

God is good all the time! no matter how tired or how unhappy i am, he never fails to bring joy to me with tiny little stuffs.. :)

thank god i got back in touch with my primary school friend after 8 years!! she was one of my very good friends during my primary school days.. found her on facebook and we chatted on msn, and few days later, we happen to see each other when i was on my way to meet my friend for lunch.. all i can say is, it's god's timing! coz on that day i was hesitating if i should go out to meet my fren for lunch.. felt like staying at home, but somehow thoughts of going out was always in my mind.. so i decided to go meet my fren since it has been quite some time we last met..

when i saw my pri sch fren, i was quite afraid that there will be awkwardness between us.. thank god, there wasn't any.. we chatted as though we had been in contact all along.. and to my surprise, her mum still remembered me!! :)

thank god for putting many good and encouraging friends around me! when i need help, need someone to talk to, god never fails to provide one for me.. though at times, when i really wanted to find someone, there is no one, i know god wanted me to turn back to him.. and when i turn back to him, he comforted me, and filled me with his peace and joy.. :) it's tough at times, but he is my strength, and he wun give me things i cant bear!

dear lord, thank you for all the good works u had done for me.. though i might feel lonely at times, but i know i am not alone, coz u are always by my side.. i might feel that no one loves or cares about me, but i know u loved me for who i am, and you care for me.. :) lord, teach me to love and accept myself for who i am..

生命过客

was watching tv and happen to hear this song.. and it got stuck in my head.. especially this phrase "一生要失败几回 才知道成功的意义"..



i juz cant really understand myself these few days.. my mind seems to be full of stuffs, and yet all things seem to be very blur.. there are many things which does make me happy, but yet i juz cant really be happy.. it's really very tiring.. i wonder if i can still hold on for how long.. :(

Lord, please help me find the real peace and joy in you!

Be Joyful

to be joyful, despite of everything bothering u, u need to know that everything is in God's hands.. tt's wat chuan told me.. yup, I agree! :)

to have peace and joy in us, we must always remember that no matter what happens, be it good or bad, god is in control of everything.. yes, everything! No matter big or small.. even the smallest things he is in control too.. :)

well, when someone is not in a good mood, it does affect the people around not feel good too.. and it's the same thing when someone is feeling joyful.. it does spread the joy to others too.. :) therefore most of the times, i will choose to crap and joke around when i'm with people.. at least it helps to make people around me happy.. :) though at times i might not be feeling very good, but if people around me are happy, i think it might help me to be more happy too.. :)

anyway, even when i dun feel good, God is still very good to me! even though i might think that the whole world don't seem to understand me, but i know God understands me.. He knows us much better than we know ourselves.. i truly believe that God has the best plans for us, and He has the most perfect timing for everything! :) even when we are in sufferings, we still have to give thanks for it.. give thanks in all circumstances, for everything is within God's control! :)

You Were Born To Be Loved

saw this video from my friend's blog.. it really touches my heart especially at the last part when she sang "You were born to be loved".. it reminded me that god really loves us alot.. he loves us for who we are..

here's the link to the video.. :) http://youtube.com/watch?v=ntReE2n15bo


here's the full song (korean version).. http://youtube.com/watch?v=4vsiLM-NWfk


你是为了接受主爱被拣选的人 - 以斯拉 http://podcast.blog.webs-tv.net/m/1805990>

你是为了接受主爱被拣选的人
在你的生命中 接受那丰盛的慈爱
你是为了接受主爱被拣选的人
在你的生命中 接受那丰盛的慈爱

创世之前开始的神 那丰盛的慈爱
借着我们的相遇 结出了果子
在这世界上 因着你宝贵的存在
真是带给我们 极大无比的喜乐

你是为了接受主爱被拣选的人
现在仍然接受 那丰盛的慈爱
你是为了接受主爱被拣选的人
现在仍然接受 那丰盛的慈爱

我感谢你 因我从来不曾知道
在你的眼里 我是何等地宝贵
从太初直到如今 创造宇宙万物的主
是何等深切爱我的灵魂
也感谢你 你让我感受到这伟大的爱
主已安排你在我生命里
以主耶稣基督的爱 更多来服事你
我也愿向世界传扬神的爱

你是为了接受主爱
来到这世上 传扬这份爱
在主奇妙计画里 把你栽种在这里
期待你结出美丽的果子
你是为了接受主爱被拣选的人
现在仍然接受 那丰盛的慈爱
你是为了接受主爱被拣选的人
现在仍然接受 那丰盛的慈爱

Friendship

True Friends :)

wat's wrong with me lately?! i really dunno!! :( thoughts juz came in and out, and i really felt quite tired and frustrated with myself..

feel like finding someone to talk to.. but dunno who to find.. pple might not be free, pple might not be willing.. many thoughts juz came in.. so i chose to online, and see if i can find anyone on msn to chat with.. probably you might think that it's a way of hiding up? but i think it's a way for me to learn to open up myself.. :) thank god for providing me someone to talk to.. i'm glad that i chatted with this friend of mine..

below is part of our chat:

friend: haha~ i really think nowadays u're getting more open abt ur feelings and ttz gd for u
me: wat makes u think so?
friend: hmmm i oso dont know.. juz a feeling
me: hahaha... i think it's a good sign for me
friend: yep yep.. give urself a pat on ur shoulder!
me: i think pple really need to be more open up to others too.. else it's difficult for ownself, it's difficult for others too
friend: yep, i agree.. and u're improving which is gd cox not everyone can do it

i was very happy to have this conversation with my friend.. at least i'm know i'm really taking out actions to do wat god is teaching me and wants me to do.. be open and true to him, to people and to myself.. i believe tt no matter wat happen, he wont give me things that i cant bear..

i think many of us have a lot of friends.. but not many of us will have a lot of TRUE friends.. i think true friends are really hard to find.. it's really not easy to find someone who you can comfortably talk to about ANYTHING, including ur problems.. someone who is willing to share with you about their life, their problems.. someone who is willing to listen to you.. someone who is willing to accompany when you needed someone to be by ur side.. even if they dun know wat to say at times, or nothing to say at times.. i feel that it's ok.. it's the company they have for u tt really counts.. true friends need not talk a lot at times, but will still be able to feel each other by hearts.. it's the hearts tt talk.. :)

thank god for putting many true friends by my side.. i felt so blessed! :) and i really appreciate and thank god for each and every one of you.. i pray tt our friendships will really continue to stay strong.. i know it's not easy to maintain a good relationship with people, but i will try my best to put in the best effort i can to keep and maintain each and every relationships i have.. god please help me! :)

Be Willing And God Will Open Doors For You

if you're willing, god will open doors for you.. :)

this is wat i've learnt over the past 1 week plus.. the willingness to do something for God will determines wat God will do for you too.. if you're willing to take out a step of faith, God will be willing to open doors for you.. :) turning back to him, focus on him, and be willing to take actions for him.. :)

recently, god has been dealing with me on relationships with people.. and i see that if i'm willing to put in the effort in maintaining a good relationship with people, he open doors for me to do so.. sometimes i juz feel quite distant from my parents, and god let me notice that the problem lies with me, not them.. when i reach home, i will just walk straight back to my room and on my laptop.. i did not make the effort to try to spend time with them or communicate with them.. but when i'm willing to change, willing to start trying to put in efforts to rebuild a good relationship with them, i see how god leads me and gave me the opportunities to do so.. :)

i once made a prayer to god.. i told him, please use me as a channel to bring people back to him.. please guide me and lead me in doing the right thing for him.. and yes, god listens to my prayers.. he never forgets wat i told him.. i may have forgotten wat i had told him before, but he will remind me instead.. :) i made the same prayer to him once again few days ago.. and he's guiding me and opening doors for me to do wat i have prayed for..

god is good.. other than rebuilding a good relationship with my parents, i also saw how god helps me to get connected back with friends that i've not met up for a long time, and build up a better relationship with friends that are still in touch quite often.. :) recently, i've learnt how to be more open up to people, i've learnt how to take the initiative in dating my friends or even starting a chat with them.. it's a breakthrough for me as i'm quite a quiet and passive person.. :p

i noticed that i do have many good friends around me and i need to continue to put in effort in spending time with them.. maintaining a good relationship with people is a 2-way thing.. it takes effort from both parties.. it may be juz sending a short sms asking them how are they, or meeting up for a short lunch/dinner, or having a short msn chat, or calling them up for a short catch up, it's all ways to get ourselves connected with them.. they might not be responding to us as actively as what we want, but all these are ways to show that we still care about them, we still love them, we still remember them.. it doesn't takes up a lot of our time.. it's the effort and thoughts that really counts.. :) who knows, one day we might need them to encourage us, to support us, to let us know tt we had not been forgotten too.. :p

juz do watever that is within our own abilities and capabilities, for wat we are doing, god sees it and he appreciates it.. it might juz be a little action from you that can change someone's life! we wont know, but god knows.. 试试看， 做做看，一定行！

Fear Not, For I Am With You!

it's really not good to have too long a break and got nothing in mind!

for the past 1 week, life was a complete misery for me.. negative thoughts just kept coming into my mind.. i felt really lost, really tired.. it’s a real torment.. was struggling to get things sorted out.. cant find any peace and joy.. felt super uncomfortable that i really got the thought of going back to my old self, felt like hiding myself up.. it's to an extend that when you want to find someone to tok to, there is no one around.. and if there is someone for you, you juz dont feel like toking.. :(

it’s juz like you had put on the lock, and it’s juz a step away to either remove the lock or lock it and that’s it! it's a really really tough process to go thru, as the outcome of both action will be completely different.. at times, it just seems like i've already gotten over things, but the fact is, i had not completely got over, and negative thoughts will juz come and go as they wished to..

really thank god he had never forsaken me and never leave me in my toughest time.. in fact now i really know why we will have to go thru such tough process at times.. sometimes we are juz to complacent with our present life that we may had forgotten about god’s goodness to us.. and at these times, god will let us go thru sufferings to remind us to go back to him, to remind us how weak we humans can be.. it’s even to the extend that we can feel really helpless and all we can do is to cry out to him and seek him.. :)

i guess i had already completely get things over, and had learnt many things thru this process.. god reminded me and teaches me many things over the past 1 week.. haha.. i give thanks to him that it’s only 1 week and not 1 month, or even up to 1 year.. :p

few things that god taught/ reminded me:

1. how to be more open up to him and to others
2. how to look at things from different perspectives
3. how to seek him and feel his presence
4. we need to spend the effort to take some actions to see things changed
5. have faith in him and not doubt him
6. the harder it is, the greater the glory
7. for all things that happen, it happen for a reason.. and ultimately it is to glorify his name
8. dont think about what others think, juz do the right thing for him
9. juz do things that are within our abilities and capabilities, for whatever we do, we are doing it for him.. he sees and appreciate wat we do..
10. always know that he is in control of all things, and he has his best timing and plan for all things..
11. he really understands and knows wat we are thinking and how we are feeling, juz got to fix our eyes upon him, open our hearts to him, and follows wat he wants us to do, and he will open his doors for us..

experienced his goodness to me yesterday.. went to airport with angie, esther, sarah, and weiying.. when i’m on my way home, was feeling a bit tired.. got the urge to take a cab home.. coz wat i have in mind is to get home fast! haha.. in the end, i did not take a cab.. took mrt to kallang to change bus.. while i was walking to the bus stop, i was hoping that i will not wait too long for my bus to come.. so i juz made a short conversation with god.. i said that, god if u are really good to me, please let my bus come juz as i reach the bus stop, so i do not need to wait so long for the bus to come.. and when i juz reach the bus stop, i turned around to see if there’s any bus coming, i saw my bus.. at that moment, i was so shocked that there is nothing i can do or think but to give thanks and praise him for his goodness! that’s not the end.. haha.. when i board the bus, i told god, please let me reach home by 1045pm.. and when i reach home, it’s not even 1045!! haha..

well, all i can say is.. he really listens to every single little things we said.. even if it is the smallest thing, he still listens to us.. all we have to do is to pray and have faith in him, juz believe and not doubt! :)